We want to live a happy joyful life. But there are lots of unhappy incidents. So we are looking out to find the root cause of it to resolve this problem of unhappiness. Surprisingly the cause is quite evident and any one can see it. It is the importance given to our own self- image. The me, myself and all that self importance.Nothing wrong with it as such, and because of the self image we acquired many things, the name fame power and so on.
The trouble is , we have taken it to an extreme. In this process we have lost something. We failed to make intimate relationships with our own people. We failed because we could not give our time, our attention, and show our concern care. Life is like a see- saw play, if one end goes up, the other end comes down.We did so because we failed to recognize the importance intimate relationships, love and its connection to health and happiness.
We took it for granted that love and intimacy will come to us anyway while we succeed in our material life. Acquiring wealth, property and status.
The reality is we need to work hard, give our time, mind and our energy. It wont simply fall from skies for a tall wish. And that is exactly the reason why we are unhappy and even sick.
Look at this example, - Here is a law abiding responsible gentleman. He follows all the traffic rules and he is a good driver. But there are problems. The traffic is heavy and roads are narrow.
Not all vehicle drivers are law abiding and respecting the traffic rules. They are in a hurry. They make mistakes and disturb others.
Now this gentleman gets upset with this kind of life. He suddenly gets angry, shouts at such people uses foul language and insults them. Some people feel annoyed and get into an argument and even fights. People criticize him for his arrogance, acting like a boss and finding fault with others.
This makes him more angry and he is frustrated. Now he suffers from -Nobody should criticize me- syndrome. People criticize him at the back. He becomes suspicious. Always remains on guard. Avoids people. He has no intimate good friends who would care for him. Lately he has developed high blood pressure and diabetes.
If we look into our own behavior, we all suffer to a greater or lesser extant from lack of intimate close relationships.